What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Do you know what she said mum?

So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Why do some straight men enjoy wearing women's lingerie?

What do you mean son?

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Why did Donald Trump and Melania Trump sleep in different rooms?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

How do I identify fake friends in life?

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

How exactly do things get smuggled into prison? Does the sender hide it inside something else very well? Does someone put it in their butt? Do the prisoners make deals with the officers?

What! how could you do that?

True - how I loved my mum!

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”